There are many coaches or mentors that will agree to have the right attitude and skills that will make you successful. And I agree with this. However, there is a third thing you need to survive in the real estate business. Many agents fail in the real estate, and I believe it’s because they are missing one key element. 

It’s something you can learn or master. It comes with time and failure, and can only be mastered by choosing to recognize it.

Looking at all the successful people around me, I see the different ways they achieved their success.

There were some that were quicker than the other. And some of them impressed me with the hard work they put into it. Although there were also people that didn’t work that hard.

They worked rather very smartly and made sure that all the days were productive. I know people that only work 2-3 hours a day and make a great living.

There are 4 things you see in every successful real estate professional that can’t be denied. These are the 4 basic ways that every real estate agent or people related to real estate need to have.

These 4 steps are: Attitude, knowledge, skills, and action. I talk about this more on my other blog called “4 Steps You Take To Be A Professional Real Estate Agent”.

But these 4 points don’t give you the guarantee to become successful.

There is always this one missing ingredient.

The 5th step will stop people fail in real estate. 

Not having this ingredient will make the 4 steps useless to you. I mean I don’t think you will be useless. I just say that the 4 steps have an additional 5th step that you can learn. There are lots of ways to call it, but let’s call this – Mental Toughness.

Mental toughness is one of the most crucial parts of being in the business of the real estate. The number of rejections, problems, and failures in real estate are big.

If anybody asks you again why real estate people make so much money, you just say that our profession deals with one of the highest rejection and failure rates than any other profession. Except for a few other crazy professions, of course, but you get the point.

Over the years I’ve seen a lot of new real estate professionals come and go. Everyone is motivated in the beginning and then they realize how hard this industry is.

Real estate hurts and it’s a process. Thinking of it, I have never met anybody that became successful overnight.

So what does this tell us? We have to be patient and we have to be tough. Not angry towards the whole world. We have to be mentally tough and take a hit from time to time.

Why do agents fail in Real Estate?

I have seen many real estate professionals stop after a few weeks, months, and even after a few years. And 95% of them have a similar reason. They couldn’t handle the rejection and failures.

Most of them were getting crazy about the deals that didn’t go through. Or they got crazy about the people that kept negotiating and didn’t want to make the deal.

Suck it up, it’s part of the real estate game. And if you can’t handle it, please make sure you don’t waste your time starting this game.

As you start working in real estate, you will need to take the 4 steps in creating your path to become successful. Because real estate is a relationship business, you will meet all kinds of people.

And people will do two things in this world. They make it and they break it. Don’t get me wrong, working with people is the best thing ever.

Still, you need to be prepared to do crazy things in the future. You want to be mentally prepared for this. And the sooner you brace yourself, the better you can handle these mental hits.

Over the years I’ve met a lot of people that disappointed me. They were ready to make a deal and at the last moment, they pulled back.

Disappointment will always be there for agents. 

This is not only with customers; I even had it with colleagues and with one of my broker/owners. People owe you money and they don’t pay.

I had several co-agency deals and 5 years later I’m still waiting for the payment. For some clients, I went so deep and in the end, they paid me only after my lawyer had to send out a letter.

All this is part of the deal and you need to be prepared. Yes, sometimes I gave too much trust to the people, but it’s in my character.

I like people, so I trust them. For some of them, it’s an easy way to take advantage of me. But I can say I created a mental toughness over the years. This mental toughness makes me happy every day and makes sure I take all the hits I can get.

Every hit I get; I laugh about it. Every failure I have, I celebrate. Sometimes it’s learning money, sometimes its learning time. But in the end, I celebrate because I know it made me better.

Because of this learning process, you also become more experienced in the market. Your clients, colleagues, partners, and even family members will feel and see it.

They will see the confident and mentally strong person that you have become. But you need to accept the fact you will not succeed without it. You will be hit hard, but if you get up and move forward again, you will succeed for sure.

One last thing 

The last point I want to make: Because of this mental toughness, you will also change as a person.

I’ve seen this with many people and sometimes they don’t change in a positive way. I’ve seen people that became frustrated puppies and couldn’t laugh anymore.

Some people go too far on this level. They change their complete attitude based on their toughness level. They try not to get disappointed anymore, so they don’t have fun anymore.

They keep everything abstract and try to be a non-emotional person.

This is fake and you shouldn’t be doing this. Please try to be yourself. Keep learning and accept that it will keep happening.

The question is how you react once you get disappointed.

Are you going to cry, whine, complain, and curse about everything? Or laugh about it.

If you laugh about it, you will embrace the fact that it’s part of the real estate game. Laugh, drink a glace of wine and the next day move forward again.

You know why?

Because your next deal is around the corner waiting for you. But if you stop moving forward, you will never find that next deal.

Thanks for reading this blog and I would love to hear your feedback.

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